The Example is Mightier Than the Sword

It’s a new day at Chez Animal Person. My husband of almost six years said to me a couple of weeks ago: "Stop buying me meat. I only eat it because you buy it and cook it for me." Unintentionally, he actually had the nerve to blame me for his meat eating. But we’ll let that go . . . for now.

Several weeks have passed, and the only animal product he has eaten is some vegetable-rennet cheese. No eggs, no butter . . . nothin’.

Now, I’m not delusional; I know that when he leaves the house he probably eats filet mignon and Chilean Sea Bass (which, as you may know, doesn’t actually exist. It’s a marketing ploy to get people to eat a creature known as the Antarctic or Patagonian toothfish. Yum. Teeth. It’s not from Chile, and it’s not a sea bass. SURPRISE!). But at least I don’t have to deal with the look and smell of animal flesh in my refrigerator, and have to endlessly research just how humanely an animal was treated (or not) before it was slaughtered.

What my husband has found, is that there are lots of meaty-tasting, meat-textured, foods, most made of some type of soy protein, that when sauteed and thrown on a salad with some fabulous dressing, are perfectly acceptable for someone used to eating meat. And he doesn’t know how lucky he is. Twenty years ago, we had tofu and, well, more tofu to choose from, and tasty was not a frequently-used word at mealtime.

Of course, I will once again cook an allegedly-free-range turkey for him and his clients on Thanksgiving, much to my dismay. He’s just not yet able to conceive of a carcass-free Thanksgiving. Ah, but I’m thrilled he’s made it this far. He’s done it on his own time, and for his own reasons. He can’t say I made him do anything or I imposed my beliefs on him. I merely provided him with an example, and plenty of resources, and he evolved away from meat when the time was right for him.

And for all you who say we’ll never change our parents, you’re probably right. However, my mother has recently become a "vegetarian" (she eats fish). I had nothing to do with it, though. She spent a month in Scotland, next to a farm, and spent time each day with the cows. She hasn’t stopped talking about those damn cows ever since. But she also hasn’t eaten meat. When the meeting of the cow collides with the eating of the hamburger, it’s difficult to emerge without some serious cognitive dissonance (if you have a conscience).

So there you have it: I haven’t lectured anyone (unsolicited) on their eating habits in probably 15 years, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t made a difference. I even have a couple of friends who became vegans within a couple of years of meeting them. Providing those around you with an example, NOT JUDGING THEM for what they do, and always being available with resources for further information, is a form of activism.

We all have our strategies for changing the world. What’s yours?